Monday, March 06, 2006


So- I went back to yoga. I have now been there twice!

Aside from the scary shot of something that they requested we drink...which was vile, let me tell ya! I enjoyed it. I am looking forward to feeling wonderful tomorrow morning.

Then I went with Secret Squrrel and had Thai food.

Squirrel: Ok, that stuff was nasty.

Me: What the hell was it?

Squirrel: Um...Plankton....Aloe Vera?

Me: Oh God. I drank plankton.

Squirrel: Noni berries or something or other?

Me: ...peyote....festering pond water....poop...

Squirrel: Sounds about right.

Me: Hey, if we drink it every day, we'll never die!

Me: Nope, totally not worth it.

I have to say, the yoga instructors are sooooo nice, and they didn't hold a gun to my head or anything, but it's my own damn fault for caving to yoga peer pressure. Damn them and their tranquil fountains and patchouli incense!

In other news, today was my first day at the new job. Teaching first-graders that science can be fun!

I can say that I really really enjoyed it, but, I think that 16 year-olds should be required to teach these classes as a pre-emptive birth control measure.

Me: Ok, I need nine volunteers- each one of you gets to be a planet!


Me: Do you guys remember the rule about raising our hands?

8 billion tiny hands go up in the air

Me: (at random) Yes? Which planet do you want to be?

Innocent little boy: The EARTH! Because God made the Earth, right?

Another kid: Yeah, did God really make the Earth? How did he do it?

Me: Uh...

Yes, somehow I survived. But I was sweating by the end of it.

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