Eh.

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Grab Bag

So, the Farmer's Market outing was a success!

We got flowers, and radishes, and broccolini, and green beans, and asparagus, and fresh bread, and honeycomb. Then we stopped on the way home to get steaks and goat cheese.

If you've never had fresh wholegrain bread with goat cheese and honeycomb? You are missing out.

The best part? The Man cooked the steaks and the asparagus on the grill. I handled the salad and the couscous and the aforementioned bread. And we ate it out in the courtyard, which should be getting completed sometime in the next couple of weeks. We finally selected a fountain, and we need to get more sand, pavers, and trellis. but it's looking pretty good so far.
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Work has been nuts, but satisfying. I did meet with my headhunter and he is slightly manic, but I get to come up with my own lesson plans. I start teaching a unit about reptiles in a couple of weeks. I only am going to teach one class, because I want to see how things go.
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The big news: I called the doctor and made the appointment. Bloodwork on Sunday. Potential crazy-making pills will be issued on Monday. So if I start to sound insane in the next few weeks, you can blame it on the hormones. This weekend, it's go time to get the house in shape. Because I can't be psycho in a messy house...it will just make me more psycho. Does that make sense?
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If you have cats...you will thank me for this for the rest of your life. Get a ScoopFree litterbox. Then instead of buying the refill packs, find a "forever" insert on ebay. Your nose, and your cats, will thank you. It's seriously the best $119 I have ever spent.

Oliver Stone Theory

My mom has always thought that there was something wrong with me.

I have to admit, having to fight with horrible acne and my weight has not been fun. But Mom always insisted that these things were CONNECTED, along with my general laissez-faire attitude towards things like...oh, I don't know, my cavalier attitude towards school, and my tendency to sleep for 12 hours at a stretch.

I always felt like it was sort of a cop-out to blame every problem that I had on some mystery disease. "Yes, I am screwed up, but if we find the magic connection, all I have to do is take a pill....BING! All better!"

I did humor her though. I've had tons of blood panels done over the years, testing my thyroid, hormones, you name it. Nothing abnormal ever showed up.

Then yesterday, I went to my new acupuncturist. He looked over my paperwork, and paused at my fertility charts.

"Where on earth did you get this chart?" he asked, scrunching up his face.

"Oh- I had to make my own spreadsheet. My temps were a lot lower than all the pre-fab ones I could find."

He raised his eyebrows at me. "Didn't that strike you as a little odd?"

"Well, yeah, I asked my doctor about it, and he said my labs didn't show anything unusual."

"You're dipping down into temps of 95. This is a huge red flag that you're hypothyroid, which is a major factor in undiagnosed infertility. It would explain your acne, the weight, and the problems you've been having getting pregnant."

I sort of blinked at him. I actually read something to this effect in numerous places, showed those same charts to my doctor, and he pooh-poohed it.

Anyway, I was still sitting there stunned, when things got even weirder. Evidently, the new acupuncturist practices some kind of allergy abatement, called NAET. He asked if he could run some NAET tests on me. I didn't know what the hell those were, so I sort of nodded dazedly.

He explained that NAET involves me holding a vial in one hand, and then he would test my body's response by pulling down on my free arm to evaluate strength or weakness.

Aside from making me feel like a human slot machine, stuff like this makes me do that internal eyeroll. (aka, "What a load of crap!") But I acquiesced, and what the hell?

Evidently, my body is not processing iodine correctly, which would of course, affect my thyroid function. He also detected imbalances surrounding calcium, and my progesterone levels.

I was still skeptical, but polite. "Um....okay."

He laughed. And then he said, "Let's see....you should have a tender point...about HERE." And he poked me gently with a finger, and I yelled "OW!" and jumped about three feet into the air.

He continued, "You're probably prone to X, Y, and Z. You're going to need to cut out caffiene, which will help with X and Y. Regular treatment to restore your system's balance should help with Z."

That was the part that really freaked me out. These were symptoms that I hadn't bothered to mention to him, stuff I have dealt with for so long that I just considered it to be something that EVERYONE deals with, but evidently not.

So we chatted some more, and he gave me a bunch of options, and ended with, "Look, I could be wrong. But I advise you to also go to your regular doctor and have him run some heavy-duty thyroid tests, and see if you can get a medical prescription if you feel more comfortable with that. If your doctor won't listen, I advise you to find someone who will. I think this is something you should pursue, before spending thousands of dollars on IUI's and IVF, which have a very slim chance of working, especially if you are hypothyroid."

On top of that, he prescribes Chinese herbal medicines in pill form...so NO MORE ASS TEA. Hallelujah!

So I had a lot to think about. We chatted while he stimulated points on my spine with massage, then he placed the acupuncture needles, and I was knocked out, which never, ever happens to me. They came back in a few minutes to revive me, and the rest of the day is a blur.

So- I can try (again) to get my doctor to do more tests. or I have another option, to purchase natural thyroid online, which freaks me out a little bit. Hopefully, my doctor will listen to me!

You Can't Stop Progress

This has been a phone-call filled morning.

However, I have made progress on a few fronts, which is a Good Thing.

I now have an appointment with a local acupuncturist. My thinking is, if I get started on the medical procedures in tandem with Eastern medicine, I need to have someone local. I can't be jetting off to SF and rushing back. Plus, the last nightmare with Greyhound (which I still have not written down, because I don't want to re-live it)made me realize that it was more stress than I needed to get up there and back.

I feel bad, because I loved my acupuncture place in SF. But this will save a ton of time, not to mention, they are much less expensive than the place I was going to, PLUS I won't be paying for gas/bus tickets/food and shopping in SF twice a month. And I will be able to teach on Fridays and go to meetings, which will mean bigger paychecks for ME.

I estimate, after adding it all up, I'll save about $3-400 per month doing this, not to mention avoiding the craziness of so much travelling back and forth.

I talked to Mom. I have been worried about the whole situation, because these treatments are expensive, and she and Dad just bought a brand new house in Carmel. I felt uncomfortable cashing in my chips and asking for the help that has been offered. She basically told me not to be a dork. I explained that if we exhausted the early possibilites, IVF was like buying a Honda Civic every few months. She was undeterred, so at least that is something we don't have to worry about.

So I called my doctor, in order to get the ball rolling on a few procedures that I still can't think about without getting all squirmy. Hopefully, he will actually call me back so I can line things up. So that's done. And while it makes me squirmy, it's all in a day's work to these guys.

In less ovary-related news, I think I have found a new salon. I suspect it will be pricier than what I have been doing, but I don't go in a lot, so I am not to worried. If The Man complains about cost, I will just point to the acupuncture savings above and tell him, in a kind and caring way, that he can go suck it.

Le Freak, C'est Chic.

FREAK OUT. (Guys, you may want to avert your eyes.)

I went to the doctor today. For THAT check up. Since I haven't had THAT checkup since 2003 (whoops) I figured I better go in before my fallopian tubes fell off or something.

I really like my OB-GYN (which I suppose is a good thing, under the circumstances.) He's cool, and he's gotten used to my sense of humor, and he always remembers my last knitting project and asks how it turned out. And usually, I lie and tell him that I finished it, because my state of yarn-ho-ness is just out of control right now.

Anyway, a couple of enlightening tidbits for the ladies:

If you're in a monogamous relationship, you only need to come in for THAT checkup every two to three years. And here I was thinking I was being severely negligent! Evidently not. I love accidentally turning out to be responsible.

The best thing EVAR:

Okay, so it has always been my opinion that any individual who could come up with a non-humiliating scenario for the standard Pap test would be an overnight bazillionaire. I am informed that this is now on the horizon, and is already in practice in Denmark and some other countries.

Since cervical cancer is caused by PID, women can actually test at home for the virus. If it comes up positive, they'll come in to the doctor for a Pap test. If not, well, hallelujah! No stirrups for you, lucky ladies of Denmark!

Now for that "freak out" portion.

During the breast exam, my wonderful doc discovered some abnormal feeling scar tissue in one of the girls. He reassures me that he's not worried, and I shouldn't be either, but he wants to get it checked out just to be safe. So I go in for an ultrasound next week.

Yes, I am worried, but the odds are that it is nothing. I haven't told my parents yet, and I was debating about telling The Man, because I knew what the reaction would be. (I did tell him though, and for the record, I was right.) Anyway, I go in next Thursday.