Saturday, June 02, 2007

I think the word I am looking for is "nonplussed."

Have you ever gone out with a friend- someone who is fun, and you like them, and you get along really well....and then suddenly they get wasted and turn into a freaking weirdo?

Well, that happened to me last night. I think it may have been magnified by the fact that I was not drinking, and she was.

I feel bad, because I really do like this person, but basically she had a couple of shots and turned into a rampaging ho. She always has liked attention from men, and that's cool, but....We're talking, she was basically performing fellatio on strawberries. And rubbing my arm suggestively with a phallic object in order to garner male attention. You know. The kind of stuff that you may be able to excuse in a college student, but coming from someone in their forties....yeah.

Acting slutty and desperate is not high on my list of things to do on a Friday night. I am not a prude, but I was incredibly embarrassed to be associated with her. (I have no wish to appear slutty by association.) And I couldn't leave, because she had driven over from the restaurant.

As soon as The Man got out of work, I asked him to please, PLEASE come and get me. I asked my drunk friend to send me a text when she got home safely. I would have stayed until the bitter end, but watching her act that way was seriously torture.

She did send me a text, to the effect that one of the guys she was talking to (someone I vaguely know) had text-messaged her a picture of his penis. Oh, and she had just gotten home.

Me: He sent you a penis pic?!

Drunk Friend: Yeah! Do you want to know-

Me: NO! I am very happy not knowing. Please don't tell me.

DF: *giggles*

Me: You know, if a guy has a picture like that in his cell phone, how many women do you think he's shown it to?

DF: I dunno. Most of the guys I know have those pics in their phones.

Me: Are you serious?

DF: It's a guy thing. That, and they always have a picture of their car.

OK. Am I just a complete and utter Pollyanna? I am trying to be objective about it, but I really want to know if I am being a dork, or what. I would bet money that most of the men I know don't have a pic of the big P that they send out to random women. So either I am delusional, or her male friends are uncouth. I am thinking it's probably the latter. Any thoughts?

2 comments:

SaraDru said...

Any guy worth talking to DOES NOT have a picture of his penis on his phone. Talk about gibbroni! That's gross.

jenna sais quoi said...

Seriously! OK, glad to know I am not that far out of it.

The idea that men are all walking around with penis pics on their phones gives me the screaming heebie-jeebies.